Mental Toughness Requires Emotional Intelligence
Mental toughness starts with self-awareness. You don’t need to spend time discovering the deep dark secrets of your inner world but rather develop an honest understanding of what makes you tick. We use The Birkman Method in our coaching practice. Often people request our coaching in order to help them become more self-aware. It’s hard to see yourself without an outside observer. Mental toughness strengthens your ability to distinguish positive emotions from negative ones. Then you can choose to express feelings appropriately in a way that connects with other people, their needs, and desired outcomes. The Birkman Method Assessment helps you to:
1. Identify what creates your stress
2. Pinpoint what motivates your positive behavior
3. Listen and talk in ways that resolve conflicts rather than escalate them
Also Required: Self-Management and Self-Discipline
Self-discipline is not an attitude of harshness; instead it requires inner strength to choose what you will make a priority. To become a leader in your field, you’ll have to study, practice, make mistakes and find new ways to solve problems. This means you have to persist until you find a path that works successfully. As a result, you create authentic skills you can rely upon when confronted by obstacles or disappointments. This is how you build mental toughness and the strength to do things more confidently.
To improve your mental toughness, you’ll need to become more self-observant, self-aware and apply self-knowledge to how you choose priorities and make decisions.
Tips to Build Mental Toughness
A good book on mental toughness is Mental Toughness for Women Leaders: 52 Tips To Recognize and Utilize Your Greatest Strengths by LaRae Quy. These suggestions apply equally to men.
Identify your emotional hot buttons. Knowing who or what pushes our buttons and when it happens is critical to developing the ability to control a situation. This awareness allows you to carefully choose your actions and words, thus avoiding unproductive behaviors that sabotage success.
Notice your emotions as they arise, both positive and negative, without judging. Simply observe them with curiosity.
Slow yourself down with deep breathing so the fast, emotional brain doesn’t overtake the slower, rational brain.
Pinpoint the circumstances that produce emotional reactions. This awareness will enable you to calibrate your reactions in future situations.
Observe others as well as yourself. Notice emotions in other people. Becoming a keen observer of behavior is critical to understanding others. Ask questions to find out more about how others think, react, and choose priorities. But remember:
Everyone’s different. Simply observe and inquire.
There are no right or wrong reactions; allow people their uniqueness.
Observe, inquire, and learn without an agenda. Do not judge.
Cultivate and express a curiosity about life and other people..
Mental toughness must be built on a solid foundation of emotional intelligence, self-awareness, discipline, and positive social relationships. It’s hard work, especially on your own. That’s why many people seek our coaching services.
What are you doing to build your fortitude? What do you think about your own mental toughness? Do you need to improve it, tone it down, or are you operating in the zone of “just right”? We’d love to hear from you so comment below or email us directly at admin@worklifeonline.com.